The Snare of Burnout
This is the second of a series of articles in which I will attempt to bring a Christ-oriented perspective to the topic of burnout. This is a nuanced and multi-layered topic that cannot be fully addressed in one small article. Please bear with me as I attempt to speak words of truth and hope.
There was a season in my professional life when I was beyond burned out. I was in that place where I lacked compassion, feigned empathy, and joked callously. I cried at the thought of going to work but was relatively emotionless in my care for my patients. I was in that rub where I knew God had called me to my profession and role, but I had sacrificed myself, body and soul, and was now a hard shell of the woman I once was.
My drives to work were filled with panicky pleas to God, begging him to allow me to leave my profession. My job no longer brought joy, but the chaffing of my overly raw heart and the bitterness of self-sacrifice that was no longer freely given but demanded. Somewhere in the never-ending exhaustion, something in me shifted. Life lost the color of compassion, and my outlook of endless and restless monotony turned my world tan. Passion faded to cracked clay, joy tarnished to dull reality. Purpose gave way to a frenetic disquiet of heart. All I could see was me- my hopelessness, my discomfort, my sacrifices, my slow death.
Psalm 119:28-32 ESV
My soul clings to the dust;
give me life according to your word!
When I told of my ways, you answered me;
teach me your statutes!
Make me understand the way of your precepts,
and I will meditate on your wondrous works.
My soul melts away for sorrow;
strengthen me according to your word!
Put false ways far from me
and graciously teach me your law!
I have chosen the way of faithfulness;
I set your rules before me.
I cling to your testimonies, O Lord;
let me not be put to shame!
I will run in the way of your commandments
when you enlarge my heart!
In that weary place, my soul could no longer sustain itself, but unlike King David, I turned o anything but God to soothe my burning, raw heart. I loved the Lord and spent almost every moment in his presence. However, to my hurting mind, my circumstances were larger than God, and so I didn’t trust him with my hurt and healing.
In our “self-help” culture, I don’t think I did anything odd or revolutionary. Research shows that this is the natural course our hearts take when stretched to the point of exhaustion. When we reach that kind of body and soul weariness, our natural inclination is to wall off and numb our hearts. We want to protect our hearts, but when we do this, we are operating in our own strength and on our own terms. This is a deceptive way. This way has a name in our modern world. It’s called burnout.
Merriam-Webster defines burnout as “exhaustion of physical or emotional strength or motivation, usually as a result of prolonged stress or frustration. The World Health Organization (WHO) expounds on this understanding by defining burnout as “an occupational phenomenon, a syndrome conceptualized as resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed.” The WHO goes on to explain that burnout is characterized by three dimensions:
Increased feelings of depletion or exhaustion
Increased mental distance from one’s job or feelings of negativism or cynicism related to one’s job.
Reduced professional efficacy.
Consider that definition as you read the following passage:
Psalm 124:2-8 LEB
“If it had not been Yahweh who was on our side,
when men rose up against us,
then they would have swallowed us alive,
when their anger was kindled against us.
Then the waters would have flooded over us,
the torrent would have passed over our soul.
Then over our soul would have passed
the raging waters.”
Blessed be Yahweh,
who has not made us prey for their teeth.
Our soul has escaped like a bird
from the snare of fowlers.
The snare is broken, and we have escaped.
Our help is in the name of Yahweh,
maker of heaven and earth.
Do you see what I’m seeing? Burnout is a snare of the enemy. It is like a huge ocean wave, ready to engulf and drown us. At the heart of burnout is the anger of the enemy toward God’s image bearers but, the Lord, YAHWEH is on our side! And Christian, the torrent will not overwhelm your soul, the raging waters of burnout will not drown you, if you will but find relief in God.
Let's break down how psalm 124 is keying us into the fact that burnout is more insidious than merely a form of prolonged exhaustion. Jesus taught his disciples to discern good and bad teachings and ideas by the fruit borne. He says, “So every healthy tree bears good fruit, but the diseased tree bears bad fruit…Thus you will recognize them by their fruits.” Matthew 7:16,20 ESV) We know something deeper is going on by the “fruit” of burnout:
Feelings of unending or inescapable weariness.
Cynicism (compassion fatigue)
Callous responses toward others (dehumanization)
Disregard for others (dehumanization)
Loss of efficacy (loss of purpose)
The enemy twists and uses our physical and emotional limits as a snare. When we are exhausted, spent, weary, and grieved, the lies begin:
“This circumstance will never change”
“You will always be at the end of yourself if you continue doing what you’re doing”
“Your work will never again be as rewarding as it once was.”
“You must protect your own heart. No one else will.”
“Don’t let yourself feel that! It will destroy you!”
“Just get the job done. Finish the task. That’s all that matters.”
“What’s the point? my work isn’t going to change anything.”
“This is too much. I can’t do this anymore.”
“The only option is to quit.”
This snare, burnout, is so insidious because it uses our limits to take out eyes off Christ and ultimately rob others of their inherent dignity and image bearers and our personal purpose as God’s image bearers to the world.
Alternately, the faithful way, the counterintuitive way, is to turn to and cling to God’s word. Yes, literally, the Bible, and also THE WORD, Jesus. In desperation, we are to throw ourselves on the unmoving, faithful rock of God’s word. And as we cling to him, his love holds us fast through the storms of burnout.
Day in and day out, as we immerse ourselves in the word we go a little way down the path of God’s commands. It might be slow and painful at first in our sorrow. However, we will find that the longer we stay on the path, the quicker our pace becomes, and our endurance builds. Miraculously our weary and sorrowful hearts have enlarged. No longer are they throbbing and weary, but able to love even more than before.
Written by Sara Danielle Hill
Sara is a nurse, writer and founder of Undercurrents Ministries. For more more information about Sara Hill and her writing, head over to saradaniellehill.com
